bowling the sport of the gods

man, i love bowling. there are few sports in the world that encourage you to be both drunk and full of food while playing. think of any freaking bowling alley...anywhere in the world...now think what's in it....big freaking balls obviously and lanes to throw them down but more importantly you'll be thinking of all the fast food outlets that are present... no one really goes to bowl. that's just an aside, that's just a distraction from eating vast quantities of fast food.

unbranded fast food no less! this shit is so bad for you they don't want you to know who really makes it, cause they know that you will soon fall over and have a sudden and massive coronary and die and your family will be all upset and wanting revenge! they want deniability. ''he coulda bought that burger anywhere!''

but anyway, it doesn't really matter about the heart attacks, hell you're getting exercise! quit moaning, you have an excuse to eat as much as you want. it's ok to eat 14 horse burgers and turkey twizlers and wash it down with warm beer while chewing onion rings because: YOU ARE GOING TO WALK 6 FEET CARRYING SOMETHING THEN THROW IT... see exercise.

that's another thing chumps, always use the heaviest ball. even though it adds no real value to your game, in fact it detracts from your ability to actually hit a single fucking pin. and one more thing, always, ALWAYS claim every strike was on purpose. even if the ball bounces 10 feet and goes onto an adjacent lane and makes a strike! it was on freaking purpose.

i don't really know why i started this post....i guess i just wanted to say i am a sporty guy. i like other sports too, there is a common link among them, i can be drunk and full of food/on drugs while playing/doing them. they are in no particular order: mini golf, pool, darts and paragliding.

....the last one is a little difficult but i did it and only killed a few pedestrians

ok bye!

M.M.M